Wendell Grissom: A Life Marked by Trauma, Crime, and Imminent Execution
Wendell Arden Grissom, a man whose life has been fraught with hardship since birth, is scheduled to be executed by lethal injection in Oklahoma for the 2005 murder of 23-year-old Amber Matthews. His attorneys argue that Grissom’s actions, while undeniably horrific, are inextricably linked to a history of developmental issues and brain trauma, claiming he is "much more than the worst thing he did." The prosecution, however, contends that Grissom’s choices led him down a path of violence and that he should be held accountable for his heinous crimes.
If the execution proceeds as planned, Grissom will be the first inmate executed by Oklahoma this year and the ninth in the United States, reigniting the debate surrounding capital punishment and the complexities of criminal culpability.
Grissom’s own account of the crime reveals a disturbing lack of understanding. "I don’t know what made me do what I did," he confessed to police. "I don’t know. I never done anything like this in my life… I have no explanation." While admitting to the crime, he has consistently maintained that the murder was an isolated incident, a deviation from his true character. "I’m not a monster," Grissom wrote to the Oklahoma Pardon and Parole Board in 2019. "Please, somehow look past that one day in my life, for its not who I am at all."
Grissom’s legal team has repeatedly argued against the death penalty, citing his developmental challenges as mitigating factors. They claim his cognitive impairments significantly impaired his judgment and impulse control. The prosecution, however, vehemently rejects this argument, portraying Grissom as a man who embraced negativity and violence, choosing to succumb to his challenges rather than seeking help. "Grissom chose to be reduced by those challenges," prosecutors stated in court records. "He embraced bitterness, rejected many opportunities for healing and change, and left behind a path of terror, death and destruction."
As the execution date looms, it’s crucial to examine the details of the crime, Grissom’s background, and the devastating impact on the victims.
The events of November 3, 2005, unfolded with chilling brutality. Grissom, accompanied by a homeless hitchhiker named Jessie Johns, targeted the home of Dreu Kopf near Watonga, Oklahoma, with the intention of burglarizing it. Kopf was home with her two young daughters and a friend, Amber Matthews, when Grissom arrived.
Initially, Grissom inquired about Kopf’s husband, but his intentions soon became clear as he forced his way into the house, firing shots and reportedly laughing as he did so. Kopf was struck in the wrist, prompting her to confront Grissom while Matthews fled with Kopf’s 5-week-old infant into a room where Kopf’s 19-month-old daughter was sleeping.
According to court records, "Dreu begged Grissom to stop," offering him "anything he wanted" to spare their lives. However, Grissom continued his rampage, "just laughing and he just kept shooting and shooting and laughing." He shot Kopf in the head and hip, inflicting life-threatening injuries.
Hearing the gunfire, Matthews, terrified for her life and the safety of the children, "vomited all over her jeans and on the floor," according to court records. In a desperate attempt to escape, Kopf managed to steal Grissom’s truck, hoping he would follow her and leave the others unharmed. But as she fled, she heard Matthews scream, "Please don’t shoot me," before Grissom shot her in the back of the head and then in the forehead, as she held one of the girls. Matthews died instantly.
Kopf, despite her injuries, managed to flag down help and was treated at a hospital, miraculously surviving the ordeal. Police apprehended Grissom and Johns at a nearby café after local citizens reported seeing the men.
The loss of Amber Matthews has left an unfillable void in the lives of her loved ones. Her father, Garry Matthews, described her as the "apple of my eye, a cute blond blue-eyed little bundle of joy." He spoke of their close bond, saying, "She was not only my daughter, she was my best friend. In and out of marriages, she was always there for me." The memories of their shared experiences now bring immense pain. "The last restaurant we ate in, I can’t go back. Everything that reminds me of her brings back the pain."
To understand Grissom’s actions, it’s necessary to delve into his troubled past. Born in Arkansas in 1968, Grissom experienced complications during birth, resulting in oxygen deprivation. His mother, Mary Grissom, stated in court records that he "remained in the birth canal for an inordinately long period of time, causing him to suffer oxygen deprivation."
This oxygen deprivation led to developmental delays, and his parents struggled to understand him until he was around 7 years old. Mary Grissom described his early speech as sounding "like he was speaking Chinese." In school, Grissom faced emotional and behavioral challenges, further hindering his development.
Adding to his difficulties, Grissom suffered a series of head injuries from motorcycle accidents. At the age of 8, he crashed his motorcycle into a concrete surface, resulting in unconsciousness and 18 stitches to the back of his head. Further motorcycle accidents at ages 15 and 16 compounded his head injuries.
According to his attorneys, "Wendell was never the same after those close-in-time severe motorcycle accidents. He had awful headaches." These injuries forced him to drop out of school due to "physical and cognitive difficulties."
At 16, Grissom and his family moved from Arkansas to Texas. Court records reveal that Grissom committed several home invasions in Texas in the years leading up to 2005. In 1992, he was arrested for a home invasion where he stole and sold televisions, silver, watches, and jewelry. He was convicted of the robbery the following year and sentenced to 25 years in prison but was paroled after serving nine years in 2001.
After his release, Grissom returned to Arkansas and married a fellow truck driver just two weeks after meeting her. Both struggled with heavy drinking and addictions to Adderall and meth. Court records indicate that Grissom was prescribed medication for "depression, frequent headaches, anxiety, crying spells."
As his marriage deteriorated, Grissom’s life spiraled out of control. In December 2004, less than a year before the murder, he was arrested for threatening his then-wife with a rifle. Following this incident, he voluntarily entered a "residential program for chemical dependency."
Leading up to the murder in Oklahoma, Grissom was described as being in a state of turmoil. "Wendell’s professional life and personal life were in shambles, and he was depressed and suicidal," court records state. "Friends and family noticed irrational behaviors."
In early February, the Oklahoma Pardon and Parole Board convened to consider Grissom’s request for clemency. His family submitted letters pleading for his life to be spared. "Wendell is a good person who made a terrible mistake and Wendell has made many attempts to show remorse for his actions," his mother wrote. "Wendell has been in prison for nearly 20 years now, which has been more than enough time to pay for what he has done."
Despite his family’s pleas, Grissom chose not to address the board directly. Assistant Attorney General Jennifer Crabb informed the board that Grissom had expressed a lack of interest in clemency since at least July. Text messages to his spiritual advisor revealed that he considered his clemency hearing a "joke." He also expressed his lack of fear of death, stating that he knew where he was going. "I’ll finally be free from this place and all, you know?" he wrote. "I for sure do not want to spend the rest of my life in this sorry place."
Attorney General Gentner Drummond urged the board to deny clemency, arguing that Grissom’s case was a "textbook case for the death penalty." He described the attack on "innocent strangers" as the kind of crime that keeps people awake at night.
The board ultimately voted 4-1 against granting Grissom clemency, leaving his fate in the hands of the federal courts or the Supreme Court. With Governor Kevin Stitt unable to commute his sentence, Grissom’s life hangs in the balance.
